Lockdown reflection

Good day to you my lockdown lovelies,

Firstly, I sincerely apologise for my lack of posts in the last six months, I know – can you believe it’s been six months already – we are already into Autumn of 2020.

I just felt what with all of the devastation the pandemic has caused (and still causing sadly), it was insensitive to be writing about Fashion or lifestyle when let’s face it, if you are like me you’ve lived in shorts, t shirts and a messy bun whilst working from home all summer anyway.

But, I can assure you I have not forgotten about my lovely readers and I have genuinely missed bringing you all thought provoking content each month. I sincerely hope you and your families are keeping safe and well in these troubling times.

For this months post though I wanted to open up the floor to you. What has been the biggest challenges for you during these last few months? Has it been not being able to visit elderly grandparents or relatives, parents or siblings? Has it been getting all the way to the supermarket, only to realise you left your face covering at home? Overuse of hand sanitiser or face coverings leaving your faces and hands bruised and chapped? Has it been the daily pandemic update on the news causing you worry or stress? Or was it, trying to think of creative ways to entertain your children whilst we were all forced to stay at home? Perhaps it was all of the above?

I can completely understand why there has been a huge spike in individuals suffering with their mental health or feeling worried about how to keep their loved ones safe? But in all of this, one really positive side I have seen is how some of the best side of humanity has also been shown. The sheer scale of people donating home made face shields, the amount of money raised by everyday people in support and the clap for the NHS on a Thursday evening was an incredible, albeit small part of the display.

Have you thought about what little things you can do to make yourself feel good in these times though? We have recently moved into a new home in the rural countryside and for me, my simple pleasures have been going for a jog around the country lanes or at the weekend putting on a little mascara or a pair of jeans just to make it feel a little different from every other day!

Your health inside and out depends on these daily little acts of kindness to YOU! Giving yourself that pamper night – painting your nails or relaxing in a hot, Himalayan salt bath, calling your best friend to have a catch up about normal things or even having a great, big belly laugh at a silly movie curled up under a blanket with some popcorn. Try it, you will be amazed at how you feel 😊

Until next time, keep well and stay healthy.

Keya x

Friend or foe?

Good afternoon to you my loyal lovelies,

Since transitioning into my 30’s, along with seeing changes in my physical appearance, energy levels and career development – one other area I have really noticed a shift in is my friendship circle. For this months post, I really wanted to delve into the complicated world of maintaining those special relationships in the modern world.

(All images courtesy of google images)

At school I wasn’t one of the “popular”, the musical or the high tech computer sets of friends but I had a core group of around eight girls and we did everything together. I still think fondly back to the first time we got into a night club (we were so excited and felt so grown up) and also heading into London in style in our own limousine after prom night. Back then you felt as if you would be friends forever although when we all started going off to different colleges or getting work placements, the group whittled down to barely a handful by the time university or full time employment came around. I am lucky enough to still have one of my very oldest friends in my life from the first week of secondary school, it’s been 21 years and she is like a sister to me still.

I am so grateful that in my 20s I was able to travel to some amazing places around the world – real bucket list destinations like Bali, the Amalfi Coast and Brazil. Also working in Africa, Houston and Norway on secondment which was incredible for life experience (and passport stamps) but not so great for maintaining those important friendships in your life.

Don’t get me wrong, with the introduction of social media and technology like Skype and WhatsApp calls it does make the world seem a little smaller when you get that all important beep on your phone from your best friends, but as I have said before on earlier posts, sometimes social media can be as much a hindrance as a help. I still find it so strange how a quick text or comment on Instagram has replaced spending hours chatting in each other’s bedrooms, or how catching up over a glass of wine can be few and far between as life just passes by so quickly.

It’s amazing how you continually meet people as an adult also who just instantly feel as though they have been there forever – forging new friendships which mesh seamlessly with the old, reminiscent of the edges of a well worn patchwork quilt. Whether that be in the work place, doing one of your favourite hobbies or at a party through a mutual friend, I really feel as women we have an invisible bond which should be uplifting not belittling each other.

It’s universally ok and an unwritten rule too whether you have children or not, that because our lives are so full and busy – we cannot possibly expect to get a response to our message or voice mail immediately like we did when our phones were constantly glued to our hands as teenagers (quite frankly a few hours to respond is commendable, but a few days more likely)

In summary I guess I am trying to say that like any relationship, friendships also take work and effort. I put my hands up completely and admit that I tend to retreat into myself when I’m sad or hurting but if you are going through a particularly tough or difficult time and you lose friends because of it, then in my view they were not very good ones to begin with. Sometimes even when we feel as though we have 10 plates spinning in the air simultaneously, a simple voice note to your best friend is enough to let them know you are thinking of them and you are there to be a supportive hand when they are ready to open up.

What with all the controversy, wars, famine, poverty and huge social issues like the sheer number of people suffering with depression, mental health issues or loneliness – even if you have one special person in your life who you know you can always turn to for advice – CHERISH them as to me, having people around you who genuinely love and respect you is worth more than any materialistic item in the world.

Until next time, take care

Keya x

Balance is not just walking in stilettos.

Good morning to you my joyful jugglers of life,

I am sure if you are anything like me, from a young age it was drummed into you in magazines or on the television that you can be a woman who has it all – a high flying career, a beautiful family, a successful social life and for there to even be time to fit in an exercise class or two for good measure; I grew up wanting to be that kind of woman. For this months post however, I wanted to talk about Balance.

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(All pictures courtesy of Google images)

As a woman of 32, I currently have a career that I receive a huge sense of satisfaction from although I feel is still in its earliest throes of progression. I have a wonderful handful of true girl friends who I have grown up and evolved with. The main difference now being our wild nights together consist of sharing a bottle of wine whilst putting the world to rights over a nice meal instead of coming home at 5am in last nights party frock. I have an amazing family who support me through the best, the worst and every other period in-between who mean the world to me. And last but certainly not least, I have a partner in my life who supports me in every challenge I face, who is my rock and makes me laugh and feel loved in a way that I did not even know was possible until now. And to top it off, after receiving my Spinning Instructor certification back in 2016, I also ensure I get some exercise classes thrown in each week too with me on the microphone 🙂

With all the positive elements of my life though, I too fall into the trap of not knowing how to juggle all of these things successfully at times. Are you nodding your head whilst reading this – its OK if you are! haha.

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I often wonder to myself if one day we are unable to keep all of these proverbial balls in the air and one drops, what will actually HAPPEN? If we realize that we accidentally double booked a dinner date with a friend on the same day we already said we would go to visit your partners family – will we lose that friendship or cause an argument? The answer is usually no, but why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to appear to the outside world we have it all in order? And in all honesty if that was the outcome which came from those situations, the next question you would need to ask yourself is are you surrounding yourself with the right kind of people who deserve your love and time? Now that is a hard question to ask yourself believe me but sometimes the answer is so enlightening and empowering 🙂

Another trait of women statistically is we usually would not put ourselves forward for a new role at work unless we felt 100 percent certain we could carry out all of the tasks required whereas men tend to be more confident that they can learn the required responsibilities once already employed in the job. Why do we sometimes doubt our capabilities when we know that we are just as right for that role as our male counterpart? It all comes down to having self Confidence and Esteem. I have learnt only in the last few years that I AM good enough and even know you may not have the necessary experience in a particular industry, it will translate to another in many circumstances. Finding those commonalities will mean the sky really is the limit for you.

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I will wholeheartedly raise my hands and say that I am a perfectionist in all areas of my life and I genuinely feel like super woman when I have managed to do a days work, taught an energetic spin class, cooked a healthy dinner, put a load of washing on and still managed to enjoy a relaxing glass of wine with my loved one before bedtime – but realistically not every day is like that. Some days, my only achievement is moving from my bed to the sofa and back again but with each passing year I have learnt that doing nothing is OK too.

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Which brings me perfectly to the very subject of this post – Balance. Life will always inevitably get stressful, activity filled and chaotic which will only increase when children are thrown into the mix but as my wise parents often remind me Rome wasn’t built in a day and if you cant get all your washing done today – we have another 60 years hopefully of doing it so it really does not matter. Or if you realize with a heavy heart you haven’t seen your best friends for a month, just pick up the phone and give them a call – sometimes just hearing your voice and letting them know you are thinking about them is enough until you next can see each other for a catch up.

Life can be tough enough at times, so why add that additional pressure on yourself to try to do everything all of the time – kick back, relax and go for that impromptu dinner date or picnic in the park. The routine can wait until tomorrow 🙂

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Until next time, take care

Keya x

 

The meaning of friendship 

Good day to you my heart of gold heroes, 

For this months post I really wanted to delve into the complex world of the strange, intimate and sometimes awkward human interaction fondly known as friendship. Moving to the other side of the world from those closest to me was one of the hardest decisions not only due to being away from my family but also being separated from my second “family” – my friends. 

(All images courtesy of google images)

Looking back at my life in my 31 years on this earth, it is staggering the amount of friendships I have maintained and lost over the years. When I was at school, I had a large groups of girl friends and we did everything together, I still remember fondly our prom night when we all went round to one of the girls houses and posed for photographs leaning against our rented limousine. We felt so special and grown up on that day. Although I am still close with that group of girls to this day through social media and if we bump into each other on the odd occasion, there is only one who is still my best friend to this day, 20 years on.


One of my other closest friends I actually met through a mutual male friend who both of us actually hardly talk to any longer but we’ve maintained a close connection still. We have countless stories of adventures across Europe and hilarious stories which only we share. 

Another I met through a running club I joined whilst living in South Africa when I was training for a marathon. It’s incredible to say we ran the race together and now that same friend has since got married and just had a baby with her loving partner. 

And last but not least, one of my other oldest friends I met at work and through sitting next to each other every day for three years (can you believe there wasn’t one argument) we’ve since been to Glastonbury, countless music festivals and laughed and cried more than some do in a lifetime together. 


It really warms my heart reminiscing about that handful of incredible, inspiring women in my life knowing that we still regularly keep in touch via the wonders of FaceTime, what’s app  and social media. Every time I see a message pop up from them, I get a small smile on my face knowing they are thinking of me as I am them everyday. 

And then having moved here, I already had some fully formed friendships with people I had met in London who are originally from Oz or friends from back home who have since emigrated so I felt like I wasn’t completely alone from the outset. 


One valuable lesson I have learnt as I’ve got older though is even if you have an amazingly supportive family, significant partner or a social calendar like the queen bee, I need to have friends in my life. From something as trivial as helping you decide what nail colour to pick at the weekend to whether you should apply for that dream job, to crying over an argument or just laughing about inside jokes until your stomach hurts, that is something that makes me whole.

If you are anything like me, you would like to have it all – the stellar career, the show worthy home, to be surrounded by people who love and respect you, to be a great parent, to be a good friend and be an upstanding member of society. Having all of this though, does not equate to having a lot of free time so that is why we are so much more selective with who we spend this time with. Friendships should be two sided, and the minute one side is slipping, it can be really hard to get back to where you once were. The hard fact of it is though, it’s all part of the circle of our adult life and I actually applaud it. 

With every fibre of my being, I love, respect and admire all of the amazing people in my life and even if you have only one truly incredible person who you know has your back, then the sun will always shine on you every day for the rest of your life. Human interaction is what keeps us humble and I cannot get enough of it ❤️


Until next time, take care

keya x